(Please don't take this seriously. This is just for humor)
Announcer: Hello, and welcome to....
Crowd: Personality Smashdown!
Announcer: Where we take two polar opposites and put them on the same show together! Our contestants tonight are Minerva Mink and Marissa Mink!
- Minerva is show filing her nails and Marissa is playing her GameBoy*
Announcer: Ahem! Girls.
Minerva: What? What's the point of being famous if I can't look famous? (winks at the audience) And if there are any muscled, rich men out there, I'm still single!
Marissa: *looks up from her game* Ugh. The show hasn't even started and I'm already 100% done with her.
Minerva: *scowls at Marissa* I heard that!
Marissa: *covers her mouth with her fingertips while looking smug* Oops. Sorry.
Announcer: Okay, okay, save your bickering for the end. Not on my show. Now, *holds up a flashcard* for the first question, "What do you usually do each day?" Minerva, you first.
Minvera: Oh, I just tend to my looks everyday, then spend some time looking for the perfect guy. However, every guy out there flirts with me, but I just be nice to them.
Marissa: You liar! You were not nice to any normal guy once! This nice dude named Waltor or something got her flowers, and you know what she did...? She probably mushed up to him then threw him away!
Minvera: Oh, yea? Then how do you respond if an unattractive, nerdy guy came up to you and gave you flowers?!
Marissa: I would at least invite them for pizza or something without acting like I don't like him...at all. *to Announcer* And if you wanna knwo what I do.....I basically sit around. Literally everywhere. I'm too lazy to get up.
Minerva: Don't you even do something worth getting attention?
Marissa: No, I don't even like being around people, thank you very much.
Announcer: Now, girls, let play nice with each other. *picks up the next flashcard* Next question, you go to your closet to find many, many outfits wearable. What do you do when your trying to make a decision?
Minerva: I'd go to the mall to buy more because all those clothes would be out of style.
Marissa: Who stinkin' cares about style? I'd stick to my baggie hoodie for a week. Maybe two.
Minerva: That hoodie?! It has, like, so many lint balls on it, it makes its own color!
Marissa: *giggles and sighs* Yep. That's my favorite.
Announcer: At least that question resulted in no fighting. Sheesh. *reads the next flashcard* What would be your ideal dream guy, and how do you flirt with him?
Minerva: Kind, warm, really rich parents, and is super ripped. As for flirting, I just use myself. Speaking of which, *grabs the announcer's tie and bats her eyelashes* Will you go into the kitchen and...get me a glass of water? My throat is parched.
Announcer: *does a bull horn expression, runs around like a horse around the stage, then skids to a stop in front of Minvera* Yes, ma'am! I will get you our water! Be right back folks! *runs off the stage*
Minerva: That's how it's done, big boys. *all the guys sigh at her beauty*
Marissa: *sarcasm* That was just sad. Really. I feel bad for ya. *turns toward the audience and whispers* That was sarcasm! *Announcer comes back on with Minerva's water, set it down to her*
Minerva: *tickles his chin* Thanks a bunch, potpie.
Announcer: Eh, hehe! *notices Marissa* Oh, uh, did you wanna...?
Marissa: Not really. Back to the question, my ideal dream guy would be a nice guy. Someone who would treat me with respect, and...love me for who I am. Someone to be myself with. Someone who is laid-back, cute and doesn't mind my laziness or messiness. Someone who is actually handsome on the inside. Someone like...
Announcer: Louie? *A skunk about human sized comes out onto the stage. He had purple fur, roundish glasses, a blue sweater, and jeans*
Marissa: *drools*
Minerva: That guy! Ooh, he's rich!
Marissa: *snaps out of her trance and glares at Minerva* Hey! I saw him first!
Minerva: You wish!
Louie: *stares at them while they're fighting* Uh, do you zink maybe I should go?
Announcer: Yea, thanks for coming anyway. *Louie leaves* Okay, girls! Last question. You're gonna like it. "What do you think of your opposer?"
Minerva: Lazy.
Marissa: Gold digger.
Minerva: Too opinionated.
Marissa: Too shallow.
Minerva: Oh, you did NOT just call me shallow!
Marissa: If by shallow, you mean I can stand in a puddle without getting my feet wet...then yea.
Minerva: Well, you have no fashion sense!
Marissa: You have no kindness sense! You've rejected every guy that's been kind to you!
Minerva: Oh yea, well, you've rejected every attractive guy that came your way!
Marissa: Well, they're mean! At least the guys I've liked are nice!
Minvera: Oh, you are so toast!
Marissa: You and what toaster?!
- They keep fighting*
Announcer: Well, uh, I guess that the end, folks! Thanks for tuning to Personality Smackdown! Tune in next time to see Yakko and Dr. Scratchinsniff battle their personalites!